Frozen Lies
by Lindstrom
Summary: What if the king was lying when he said Elsa was born with her powers? Children have no choice but to trust their parents, even when those parents are untrustworthy.
1. Chapter 1 - The Last Day of Childhood

**Author Note: These first two chapters are the events in the movie, with the addition of memories and thoughts that add in the twist. My original story picks up in Chapter 3. You can skip chapter 1 and not miss much, but chapter 2 contains the twist I've put in. **

**Arendelle and all its characters and the movie events belong to Disney. Obviously.**

* * *

**Chapter 1 - The Last Day of Childhood**

Outside a spring night blew gentle breezes over the kingdom of Arendelle. The breeze wafted into the open window of the castle and tickled Anna's nose. The little princess wiggled, rubbed her nose, and woke up. The sky was alive with the northern lights.

Instantly Anna leapt out of bed and tackled her sleeping sister. "Elsa! Wake up! Hurry before it's time for breakfast and lessons! We can play! Come play with me!"

Elsa mumbled something, trying to push her sister away. "Go back to sleep."

"I can't. The sky's awake so I'm awake, so we have to play!" Anna's ruddy hair fell over Elsa's pale blonde braid as she sprawled over her sister.

Elsa pushed Anna off the bed and burrowed under the blankets.

Anna played her trump card. "Do you want to build a snowman?"

Elsa's eyes popped open. She pushed Anna off in her hurry to get out of bed. The princesses grabbed slippers and dressing gowns and tiptoed with many giggles down the corridor to the empty ballroom. The doors stood open. Elsa paused at the door and Anna tugged her in.

"Well?" Anna demanded as Elsa did nothing.

Elsa smiled, enjoying Anna's excitement and anticipation. She could do things no one else could do, and her sister loved her for it. But she had to let go of all that before the magic worked, so she always paused first to savor the happiness before it was gone. At last, Elsa released Anna's love and excitement and turned inward, seeking the cold. It was easier to find now. It frightened her sometimes. But Anna loved it, and Elsa would do anything for Anna.

Elsa rolled her hands until a snowball appeared. She tossed it towards the ceiling, where it burst into a gentle fall of snow. Gradually, ice spread from Elsa's feet over the floor of the ballroom. With a puff of her hands, Elsa created billows of snow drifts.

"Make the slide!" Anna demanded.

Elsa concentrated and a tall pile of snow formed at her bidding. She smoothed the front, created steps at the back, and put a soft drift at the landing. Elsa released her hold on the cold power inside of her to rejoin her sister and play.

"Let's go together!" she called. With Anna safely hugged to her, the sisters slid down the slide and piled into the drift.

"Again!" Anna said. They climbed the snow stairs again and again, sliding until Anna tired of it.

"Come skate with me!" Elsa called. "Watch me!" She slid across the ice, managing a small cautious turn before she fell.

"My turn!" Anna said, following Elsa across the ice. Anna had none of Elsa's caution, zipping as fast as she could go, landing in a snow drift when she needed to stop. Her next time across the ice, Anna jumped, flailed wildly as she came down, and shrieked with happiness when she managed to keep her balance.

"Don't fall!" Elsa warned her.

"You catch me when I do!" Anna replied, and flew across the ice again.

Elsa skated in front of Anna, cutting her off and catching her before she could land in the snow again. "Take my wrap," she said, pulling it over Anna's head.

"I'm not cold," Anna insisted. She wanted to be just like Elsa, but her shivers gave her away.

Elsa skated off in nothing but her nightgown. "I'm older than you, so you have to do what I say."

"Bossy!" Anna accused.

Elsa threw a snowball at her, and the argument dissolved into a snowball fight. Elsa made sure to miss Anna most of the time. Anna had no such restraint and soon Elsa was covered in snow that didn't melt off her hands and face.

She brushed it off and rolled a snowball, and then another. Soon she had a snowman. She held him from behind like a puppet and walked it up to Anna. "Hi, my name is Olaf, and I like warm hugs."

Anna pealed with laughter. "I love you Olaf!" She hugged him. The sisters skated around the ballroom with Olaf.

Anna finally got tired of Olaf and said, "Elsa, make me a high slide. I want to fly up in the air."

"I don't like that," Elsa said. Only once before had she tried to launch Anna from a snow slide. When she was playing with Anna, it was hard to reach the cold places inside quickly enough to create the snow exactly when Anna needed it.

"Please, please, please," Anna begged.

Elsa relented. She dropped Olaf into a lump and turned her feelings away from Anna, inward and cold. She built the slide. Anna climbed up eagerly and launched herself, laughing with excitement. Elsa blew out a pile of snow for Anna to land on. Anna leaped to the next pile of snow, then the next one, having so much fun that Elsa began to enjoy it too. Her snow started to slow down, but Anna didn't slow down. She went faster.

"Slow down, Anna! Slow down!" Elsa cried.

"You can do it, Elsa!" Anna shouted back.

As Anna flew through the air, Elsa's fear grew real. Anna wouldn't believe that Elsa couldn't keep up. She was the big sister; it was her role keep her little sister safe. But Anna was flying faster and faster on the slides Elsa had created. Elsa's snow piled deeper and deeper, but not in the right places. Anna was out of control; Elsa's snow was out of control. Elsa cried for her to stop.

A puff that should have been snow went right into Anna's head. Her body skidded down the snow and stopped, motionless, with Anna's smile still frozen in place.

"Anna!" Elsa screamed. Elsa scrambled over the snow and ice to reach her sister. The ice started to climb the pillars of the room while the snow in the air thickened and fell around them.

She pulled Anna into her arms and watched a lock of Anna's ruddy hair turn pale blonde like her own. Like me, Elsa thought, and an immense craving for companionship filled her. If Anna became like her, she would have someone to talk to. Does it frighten you sometimes, she would ask. Do you have to leave behind your happiness to make the snow? Can you still cry?

The rest of Anna's hair didn't change. Anna didn't wake up. Elsa realized something was very wrong.

"Mama! Papa!" she screamed, cuddling Anna and sobbing. She wished she could get her warm again. "Wake up, Anna, please wake up."

Her parents burst into the ballroom while Elsa was still crying and pleading with Anna to wake up.

"Elsa, what have you done?" her father gasped.

Elsa's terror increased. Spears thrust up from the floor. Ice flooded the balconies. Father said not to make the snow. That's why they had to play before anyone else woke up. "Anna wanted it," she cried. "I only made so much snow because Anna wanted it." Then she looked around the room at the icicles and frost that had grown in the few minutes since she'd struck Anna. "Not so much as this," she admitted.

Her mother was gathering Anna away from Elsa. Elsa let her go. Mother's arms were warm. Mother looked at her and the ice under Elsa thickened fourfold.


	2. Chapter 2 - Two Lies About the Past

Author Note: Pabbie and the trolls are called the "rock trolls" in my story. The cave trolls are their bigger, badder cousins. They don't show up in the movie at all.

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**Chapter 2 - Two Lies About the Past**

The king rushed to the castle library. The morning sun was shining outside, but the library drapes were still closed. The king didn't take time to open the drapes, but held up his candle to search for the book he needed. He knew where it was. As he pulled it off the shelf, it opened to the pages he'd read so many times, but he flipped past the spells of the cave trolls, searching for how the rock trolls countered the magic of their cousins. His concern for Anna warred with his anger at Elsa. He'd forbidden her to use her powers. Now her disobedience had endangered her sister.

There was the sketch the cave trolls had drawn for him, when he'd thought the rock trolls could help Elsa. In the end, he hadn't taken her to the rock trolls. They wouldn't have understood why he'd pursued the spells to the cave trolls after they'd refused to help him. But the rock trolls would help Anna. He snatched the map out of the book.

The groom saddled their horses and knew better than to ask questions. The king settled Anna's inert form as best he could on his wife's horse. The king took Elsa. They didn't dare leave her behind. Together, the royal family galloped out of the courtyard and across the causeway to the mainland. They headed up to the mountains, leaving a ballroom full of snow and ice for the servants to wonder about.

If they had looked behind them, they would have seen Elsa's trail of frost. A boy and his reindeer fawn saw Elsa's frost and followed them.

King Agdar reined in his horse in a gully below the mountain peak. A profusion of round rocks littered the ground. He dismounted and helped the queen with Anna while Elsa climbed off the horse.

"Please help me," the king called. "My daughter! Can you help my daughter?"

The rocks started to rumble and roll. They rolled up and over and into trolls with rock bodies and mossy hair. The queen started in surprise and tried to step back, but there were trolls behind her too. Curious faces blinked up at them.

"It's the king!" came a murmur of surprised recognition.

"My daughter has been struck by magic. Can you help me?" Agdar asked again.

The crowd of rock trolls parted as Pabbie, the oldest troll, made his way down to the family. "Struck by magic, you say?"

"Yes, her sister," the king nodded towards Elsa.

Pabbie looked at Elsa. "Born with the powers or cursed?"

"Born," the king said, "and they're getting stronger."

Elsa looked down and away. She hadn't known she was born with her powers. She'd thought they'd appeared after her father took her to the cave trolls. He'd needed her to help him, he'd said, and she was the only one who could do it. Elsa had been so proud and eager to help her father. Then the cave trolls started a spell that frightened Elsa. Her father had cut both her hands, right below the thumb joint.

"We need just a little blood Elsa," he'd explained. "I'd never hurt you, and this doesn't hurt, does it?"

Desperate to do everything her father wanted her to do, Elsa shook her head. It didn't hurt. But then she was disobedient and let it hurt anyway. She'd plunged both her hands into the snow to freeze the pain. At her father's cry of dismay, she'd clapped her hands to her eyes to hide in the manner of young children who thought they couldn't be seen if they couldn't see. The basin of snow spilled over her feet.

She knew she'd done something very wrong, but at least the spell-making stopped. But father was angry.

"This isn't what I paid for!" he shouted at the cave trolls.

"You paid for a spell. Not our fault the girl took it from you."

On the long walk home with her angry father, Elsa started to cry. Her body shook, but there were no hot tears burning her cheeks. Snowflakes hung about her.

"Stop that!" her father ordered.

Elsa never cried again, always willing to do whatever father said. So she believed him now too. She'd been born with these powers. She looked up at her mother, the queen. Mother looked sad and confused. She smoothed Elsa's hair, but didn't smile at her.

The oldest troll was examining Anna. "You are lucky it wasn't her heart that was struck," he noted. "The heart is not so easily changed, but the head can be persuaded. We should remove all the magic from her, even the memories of magic, to be safe."

The king nodded. "Do what you must."

Elsa watched as Pabbie pulled a series of glowing memories from Anna's head. All of the morning's fun hung gleaming in the air as Pabbie erased the ballroom and put the memories outside in the real snow, even though it was warm spring right now. Other memories came too, every time Anna had played in Elsa's snow. He erased Elsa's magic from every one.

As he worked, Elsa let herself hope that father would ask him to take the magic out of her too. He didn't.

"There," Pabbie said as he finished. "She will remember the fun and the love, but not the magic."

"She won't remember that I have powers?" Elsa asked.

"No," Pabbie said.

"It's for the best," Agdar told her.

Elsa believed him.

"Listen to me, Elsa," Pabbie said. "Your powers will only grow. There is beauty in it, but also great danger."

Pabbie created a glowing image in the air of Elsa, dancing in the snowflakes. Then the snowflakes turned to sharp spikes and spears, held by people who menaced Elsa. Elsa's image cowered in fear before the angry people wielding the ice she had made. Then they destroyed her.

Elsa waited for Pabbie to pull the magic out of that scene too, and make it ordinary like he did for Anna. He didn't. Pabbie couldn't help her, Elsa realized. There was something terribly wrong and dangerous about her, and no one could help her. And father said she was born like this; this is who she was. Her power had always been connected to fear, and now that she was afraid of herself she felt the ice in her quadruple.

"You must learn to control your power," Pabbie continued. "Fear will be your enemy."

Elsa nodded. Control. Control as perfect as ice, locked inside her soul with the fear that was her worst enemy.

The king hugged Elsa, to her great relief. Father still loved her, even though she was defective and dangerous. He would make it all right as long as she trusted him and did exactly what he wanted her to do.

"We'll protect her," he promised Pabbie. "We'll lock the gates. We'll reduce the staff and keep her powers hidden from everyone, including Anna."

Elsa stifled a gasp at such a terrible future. She waited for her mother to say something to save her from it. She didn't.

Idunn studied her husband, but didn't say anything. At least she had this one daughter back. She hugged small Anna to her, and trailed her fingers over the lock of hair that was still as pale as Elsa's.

The king lifted Elsa onto his horse. They slowly rode home.

It was all for the best, the king told himself. He hadn't meant Elsa any harm. His friend, the Duke of Weselton, told him of spells to control the weather. If he could keep Arendelle's fjords thawed and navigable a few weeks longer every year after everyone else was frozen in for the winter, they could nearly double their trade revenue. He'd just needed the spells to control the winter. The cave trolls said the spell cost blood and it couldn't be his own. He'd given them Elsa's blood. If she'd just done as she was told, she wouldn't have stolen the spell and he would have been the one who could control the winter. He'd been trying to benefit Arendelle, and Elsa had ruined it all. She would have to bear the consequences.


	3. Chapter 3 - Keeping the Secret

**Chapter 3 – Keeping the Secret**

The king began with the head groom who took their horses when they arrived home. "Make arrangements to sell the horses we use for breeding, and reduce the staff accordingly. Keep only a riding horse for my wife and myself, horses for the carriage," his gaze fell on Anna, who was still blinking and sleepy, "and a pony for Anna."

"Yes, your Majesty," the groom replied.

Idunn took the girls back to their room, where she bathed Anna's hands and face, wrapped her in a warm nightgown and put her to bed.

"Mama?" Elsa asked.

The queen looked at her. "How would you like to have your own room? I know you like the purple room in the east corridor. What if we move you there?"

That was so far away from Anna, but Elsa sensed her mother wanted her to say yes. So she did.

At first, Anna didn't question Elsa's absence. Her mother said Elsa was sick. Besides, it was summer, and she never did play much with Elsa in the summer. But when the first snowflakes fell, Anna decided that Elsa had been sick long enough.

She raced to Elsa's room, far away in the east corridor, and knocked on the door. "Do you want to build a snowman?" she called through the keyhole. "Let's play!" No one ever told Anna no, so she kept asking and asking. At last, Elsa yelled at her to "go away!" Sadly, Anna went away, sure that Elsa was only mean because she was sick, and soon they could play again. But every time Elsa told her no, Anna believed it a little bit more. No one could be that sick. Anna alternated between missing Elsa, and being angry that Elsa wouldn't even talk to her through the keyhole.

Finally, when winter was almost done, Elsa came out to play in the snow. Their parents came with them.

"Do you want to build a snowman?" Anna asked.

"We can try," Elsa said doubtfully.

They tried to roll snowballs, but they fell apart. Elsa couldn't even get one snowball to stack on the other one.

"You used to make the best snowmen," Anna sighed.

"I guess I can't anymore," Elsa said.

"Never mind, let's go sledding!"

There weren't hills inside the castle courtyard, just enormous piles of snow. It was hard work climbing up the hill, and only a few seconds to slide all the way down. Anna quickly grew tired.

"Let's try ice skating," Anna suggested.

They looked around. There was only a little bit of ice in the fountain.

"I remember ice skating lots. Do we have to go to the mainland for a lake?"

Their mother and father shook their heads in unison. "It's too far."

"Can we skate on the fjord?" Anna persisted.

"It's too dangerous," Idunn said.

Elsa was watching her feet, and didn't look like she wanted to go ice skating anyway.

"This isn't much fun," Anna pouted.

"Let's go back inside," Agdar said.

"Should we slide down the banisters?" Anna whispered to Elsa when she thought their parents couldn't hear.

The queen heard. "Elsa is tired and needs to rest."

Elsa walked away. She didn't even wave.

Anna stood there, watching Elsa leave, wondering why Elsa didn't love her anymore. Her eyes filled with tears. Elsa wouldn't even talk to her.

"Let's go look at the portraits in the gallery together," the king said.

Anna followed her father to the portrait hall. People alone in paintings looked stern. Groups of people were having parties or dancing and eating. We are alone, Anna thought, and that's why we look so stern too.

* * *

Elsa followed her mother back to her room. "I didn't use my powers," she said at last.

"That was good," her mother said.

"I could go outside again, don't you think?"

"It will be summer soon," the queen said. "If you make a mistake in the summer, it will be too obvious. Wait until next winter."

Elsa bowed her head.


	4. Chapter 4 - Mistakes

**Chapter 4 - Mistakes**

Elsa did make a mistake that summer, but it was indoors. Gerda, the housekeeper, brought her a tray for breakfast, as she did every morning. The sun came up early in the summer. Elsa was standing at the window, looking at the flower bushes down below, pretending she could hear the bees buzz from up here.

"Here you are, dearie," Gerda said, bustling about, "come eat your porridge while I make your bed."

Elsa dutifully sat down at her table. "Gerda, do you like flowers?"

"Of course I do. I've got a patch of purple pansies right outside my door. You should come see them sometime. It would do you good to get out more."

At the thought of leaving her room, Elsa froze her spoon. Quickly, she dropped the icy spoon into her lap and wondered if she could drink her porridge.

"No need for that, dearie," Gerda said. "We'll just thaw it." She plucked the spoon away from Elsa, poured a bowlful of water from the pitcher she'd brought in, and dropped the spoon in.

Elsa scrambled out of her chair and came to watch. "I didn't know you knew," she blurted.

Gerda gave her shoulders a squeeze. "Who do you think cleaned up that ballroom of ice and snow you left last summer?"

Elsa stared at her, then at the spoon in the water.

Gerda fished it out and dried it on her apron. "There, good as new. Ice isn't going to bother a pewter spoon. Now you eat that porridge and toast. I want to see you finish the entire egg too. Growing girls needs good food and you don't eat enough."

Elsa sat down with her spoon and ate all the porridge. Ice didn't ruin things forever. She hadn't known that. And Gerda could know about her ice and snow and not be frightened or angry about it.

Elsa didn't go see Gerda's pansies, but she talked about them more. Elsa was developing a hunger for everything related to summer and heat. After her tutor left every afternoon, she could stand at the window for hours, watching the sun beat down on the courtyard. The breeze that crept through the windows high above her head was warm and smelled of the sea. When the spray from the fountains was just right, she could see a rainbow. And of course, there were flower bushes all summer. Every week, something new bloomed.

One morning, Elsa asked Gerda, "could I have a flower? In a pot, I mean. I could put it on my windowsill. I would take care of it; it wouldn't make any trouble for you."

Gerda put down her broom. "Why didn't I think of that? Of course you can have a pot of flowers. What color do you want, dearie?"

"Yellow," said Elsa shyly, "yellow like the sun."

Gerda brought her a pot with a leafy green stem. "I found you a yellow primrose that hasn't bloomed yet. You can watch the blooms open over the next few days."

Elsa was delighted. She set the pot on her windowsill where they could enjoy the afternoon sun together. Every hour she checked the plant for flower buds. Every morning she told Gerda about every new leaf and bud. The day her primroses finally bloomed, Elsa was so excited she asked her tutor if he could teach her to paint.

"Paint?" Master Wade asked.

"Paint a picture," Elsa explained. "I want to paint a picture of my flowers. I could give it to Anna."

Master Wade studied the pot. "I will ask your father."

Elsa sighed.

When her father came, he said, "I can't have you using your hands with your tutor in the room. What if you accidentally froze your paints?"

"He could leave me the paints and brushes. I would only paint when he was gone," Elsa pleaded. "Like how I practice my writing."

"Painting is different," her father said.

"I want to give the painting to Anna."

"Who gave you the flowers?" her father asked.

Elsa clenched her hands into fists. There was no use trying to hide the answer, though. Only two people besides her parents ever came to her room. "Gerda did. I asked her. I take care of the flower, father. It doesn't cause her any extra trouble."

Her father thought for so long that Elsa began to fear he would take away her flower. She hid her hands beneath her skirts. Frost crept down the chair legs. She twitched her skirts to cover the frost and ice.

"You can keep the flowerpot," her father said, "but no paints."

Elsa nodded. She needed him to leave before he saw the frost on her chair so she didn't ask anymore.

Father left. The ice burst from her hands, coating her chair and spreading out over the wooden floor in a star. Snowflakes appeared and hung in the still air. It was hours before she could get herself under control.

The next morning, Gerda opened the high upper windows to let in the warm air to thaw the chair and snowflakes. She mopped up the melted ice on the floor. Elsa tried to help, but stopped when she froze a towel.

Gerda stopped cleaning and gathered Elsa up in her arms. "There, there, dearie. There's a good girl," she murmured over and over until the ice stopped coming.

After Elsa's lessons, she stood at the window watching the summer outside. Anna was in the courtyard, playing with a ball. Red flowers bloomed on the bushes behind her.

"Those are roses," Elsa murmured to herself. Lightly, she traced her finger on the window glass, leaving a trail of frost. She drew a flower in frost. It was beautiful, but white instead of yellow. She drew flowers all over her window. Absorbed in her art, she didn't see Anna staring up at her frosty window.

Something struck outside, right below her window. With a gasp, Elsa looked out where Anna was catching the ball she'd tossed to get Elsa's attention. She was waving wildly.

Elsa looked at the window. Flowers of frost covered it in the heat of summer. While she was frantically searching for a way to get rid of the frost, her hands brushed the windowsill and the entire sill iced over in spikes, pouring out from her hands and spreading quickly.

Her flowerpot! Elsa could only watch as her ice climbed the pot and covered her blooming yellow primrose. She knew it wouldn't thaw like the pewter spoon.

I wish I could cry, Elsa thought dully. Then she turned from her window and sat on her bed. Tears wouldn't make my flower live again anyway.

* * *

Outside, Anna caught her ball and stood staring anxiously up at Elsa's window. She was right there. Why didn't she open the window so they could talk? Anna waited and waited, but Elsa never opened the window.

By the time Gerda came to fetch her for supper, Anna was fretful and sad.

"Why wouldn't she open her window? She's not sick," Anna demanded of Gerda.

"Come wash up and get changed for supper," Gerda replied.

Anna followed Gerda into the castle. "I saw her there. She stood at the window for the longest time, drawing on it with chalk. She drew a whole picture on her window. She could at least open the window and wave at me."

"Hold still while I get your laces undone," Gerda said.

Anna held still for as long as she could, almost a few seconds, before whirling around and yanking the laces of her green bodice out of Gerda's hands. "Does she hate me? Why doesn't she love me enough to open the window? What did I ever do to her?"

"She can't open the window, dearie," Gerda told her. "It's nailed shut. Only the top windows open."

Anna's mouth dropped open and she drew in a long breath. "Why? Father has to fix it! I'll tell him he has to let Elsa open her window! She's my sister!" Anna started crying and wailing.

"Your father doesn't want her to open her window," Gerda tried to explain the unexplainable.

"He has to! I'll tell him!" Anna cried.

"No, no, you mustn't do that. He'll have me sent away if you tell him I said even that much." Gerda abandoned the attempt to change Anna's dress and hugged her tightly enough that she held still. "Listen and never say this to anyone, do you understand?"

Anna nodded.

"Elsa loves you. She needs you. But she's trapped, don't you see? She can't tell you and neither can I."

"Who will tell me?" Anna sobbed.

"Dearie, dearie. I can't say any more than that. Don't ask me, please. It's all I can do to love you both without being able to help either one of you. But you keep loving your sister. That's all I can say. Elsa needs you to love her." Gerda took Anna's face in her hands and tipped her up to look in her eyes. "Believe me."

Anna closed her eyes and let the tears run off her face. "I love Elsa, and I won't tell." Someday she would love Elsa so much that Elsa would love her back and then she wouldn't feel lonely anymore.

"Good girl," said Gerda. "You're a good girl. You're both good girls. When you're older, things can sort out."

"I wish I was older," Anna said forlornly as Gerda helped her change her dress for supper.

* * *

The next day, Elsa's father stopped by with a thick pair of leather gloves. "These will help."

Elsa let him pull the glove onto her hand.

"Conceal it," he reminded her.

"Don't feel it," Elsa continued.

"Don't let it show," they both said as he helped her put on the second glove.

Elsa did such a good job of not having feelings that day that she knew she didn't need the gloves, but she wore them anyway. She was disappearing. Without her hands, she never saw anything of herself at all unless she caught her reflection in the window glass. She only ever saw a glimpse of that solemn girl with the pale blonde hair before she turned away from her. She didn't want to be that girl. She wanted to be a loud, laughing girl with red hair and freckles who could throw balls, ride her pony, and run around outside. She wanted to be Anna. But the best thing she could do for Anna was stay hidden away from her. Who Elsa was and who she wanted to be grew further and further apart.

When Gerda offered to bring her another flower, Elsa said no.

After Gerda left, Elsa wished she'd said yes. But I would only kill it too, Elsa told herself. Motionless snowflakes appeared and hung in the air of her room. Elsa was angry at the snowflakes.

"I didn't even feel anything! Go away!" she shouted at them.

They hung there, ignoring her. "I hate you! Go away!" She swung at the snowflakes, but they didn't even ripple in the air. "I didn't even feel! You're not supposed to come unless I feel! Go away!" Elsa shouted again.

"What's going on?" Her door opened and her parents came through.

Ice flared from Elsa, coating the walls and floors.

"Elsa?" her father questioned, walking towards her.

"No!" Elsa shouted, drawing away. "Don't touch me! I don't want to hurt you too!"

"Calm down. You know this only makes it worse," her father said.

"It's getting stronger," Elsa said.

Her mother watched her silently as her father insisted she calm down. Elsa looked at her mother while the ice spread into spikes. Her mother looked away, and focused on her husband. Elsa studied her mother, who never said anything. The spikes grew more menacing, coming closer to her parents. Her father didn't notice, but her mother did. She moved closer to her husband, away from Elsa's ice.


	5. Chapter 5 - The Loneliest Daughter

**Chapter 5 – The Loneliest Daughter**

As the years passed, Anna waited impatiently for the day when she would be old enough to know why Elsa had to stay in her room. Gerda wouldn't tell her. Perhaps her parents would tell her the secret someday. Her mother only ever talked to her of clothes, picnics and horseback rides. Anna clung to these outings with her mother, though they were never honest enough to assuage her loneliness. She went with her mother over the causeway to the mainland, and chattered about clothes and horses because that was what her mother wanted to talk about. And all the time she kept searching her mother's face and waiting for her to talk about Elsa. Her mother always looked away, and kept talking about nothing at all.

Anna began to believe that she was the only lonely person in the castle. She was the only one who wanted to know Elsa's secret. It didn't seem to bother anyone else. Because she had this need that no one else had, she felt isolated and alone, even when her mother was fitting her for a new gown, or taking her on a picnic.

Father didn't come very often. He was busy being king and tutoring Elsa, who would someday inherit the throne. Elsa had to learn important things about treaties, trade and alliances. Elsa must be very smart and, well, boring. Mother suggested that the things Elsa had to learn were boring, and Anna was very lucky to be able to spend her days amusing herself. Anna felt guilty that she was ungrateful for her opportunities for endless fun. She wished she was important enough to learn the things Elsa was learning. It would be a connection to Elsa.

She thought often of Gerda's words that Elsa was trapped and needed Anna to love her. But Elsa's door wasn't locked, just shut. As time passed, Elsa wouldn't even talk to her through the closed door, not even to tell her to go away.

"Does Elsa miss me?" Anna asked her mother once, while they were on the mainland on a picnic.

"Your father says Elsa is fine," her mother answered.

"But does she miss me?" Anna pressed.

"Look at the columbines!" her mother said, kneeling by a patch of flowers.

"I miss Elsa," Anna said.

Her mother looked at her with a quiet warning in her eyes. Anna considered it.

"I've always liked columbines. Shall we take some home?" she said, capitulating to her mother's wishes.

After that conversation, Anna stopped hoping that her parents would ever trust her with the truth someday. She was too silly and frivolous to learn the things Elsa was learning about governing Arendelle, and too young to know the truth. She would only be loved if she was ignorant, unquestioning, and undemanding. And so Anna bent her personality to meet her parents' expectations and needs. If she was the giggling, carefree daughter they wanted, they would continue to love her. The pain had to be stuffed down, out of sight, where her parents couldn't see it.

* * *

When Anna was sixteen, King Agdar and Queen Idunn prepared for an ocean voyage to the Duchy of Weselton to discuss issues like trade, which Anna knew nothing about. At first she wanted to go with them. Then, when that was denied, she wanted them to not go at all. Yet they kept making preparations. Anna cried and was angry, but she was accustomed to the idea that her wants and wishes never made any difference.

The day of their departure, Anna walked down the long corridor towards her parents' chambers. She passed Elsa's door, hesitated for just a second, and then kept going. Her parents were going to ignore her today already. There was no need to give Elsa the same opportunity.

She ran into her parents' room. "See you in two weeks," she said, hugging them with a smile. That's the behavior they wanted, so that's what Anna gave them.

"Your Majesties, the coach is ready for you," Gerda said from the doorway.

The king and queen left their rooms.

Gerda reached out towards Anna. "Come, we can see them off in the front hall."

"I don't want to," Anna said. "I already said good-bye." She couldn't force any more cheer and unconcern.

Gerda nodded, and followed the king and queen downstairs. Anna followed a few steps behind, but stopped at the grand staircase and merely looked over the banister to see her parents' departure.

Elsa stood at the foot of the stairs, clothed in a sedate blue gown, wearing her leather gloves. Her head was bowed.

So she can leave her room if she wants, thought Anna. Anna no longer believed what Gerda had told her so long ago, that Elsa was trapped.

She saw Elsa speak a few words. Her father replied. Then her parents left without even giving Elsa a hug. Elsa stood there, looking smaller than before.

Anna remained at the banister, knowing Elsa was there and refusing to speak to her. This is what Elsa does to me all the time. I can do it to her too.

* * *

"Do you have to go?" Elsa asked, her voice breaking.

"You'll be fine, Elsa," her father answered.

If father said so, then it must be true. Elsa bowed her head, trying to believe he was right. She could govern in his absence. He'd pushed her into decisions and education well enough that she could decide what was best for Arendelle. But in her personal life, she'd never made her own decisions. He'd governed her with the gentle tyranny of always knowing what was best for her. She depended on her father completely for control of her powers and to keep Anna safely away from her. Without him, she might lose control or make a mistake. The consequences would be unthinkable. So she would do her best to not think of consequences. He would be home soon enough to fill the void for her.

Her mother said nothing at all.


	6. Chapter 6 - Tragedy

**Chapter 6 – Tragedy**

The weeks past. But instead of the time bringing her parents home, it brought news of a storm at sea, and a ship that never arrived at Weselton. There was much ado about the news, with emissaries, epistles and rumors flying around. Anna was in the thick of it, crying, hoping, begging and being so upset that everyone else was forced to calm down to allow room for her grief. They made allowances. She was their daughter, after all; the only daughter most of them had seen.

The Royal Council met frequently as it became more and more obvious that the ship would not return. Anna appeared at a meeting to cry and storm at them. She also hoped Elsa was at the meeting, but she had sent word she could not come.

"You're the Royal Council and she's the crown princess! How can she simply send word she won't come?" Anna demanded of them.

She was met with blank looks.

"We do not tell the royal family what to do," someone said at last, gently.

"If you can't tell her to come out, then who will? Will she simply die in her room and we'll all hold a meeting and wonder if she's gone, just like we have to guess whether or not the ship sank?" Anna was hysterical, more upset at Elsa's continued absence than at her parents' death at sea.

Anna continued to cry and make unreasonable demands. The Royal Council was used to dealing with Elsa, quiet and withdrawn. They had no experience with Anna's open emotions. Finally, someone sent for a servant, who knew to send for Gerda.

Weeping copiously, Anna allowed herself to be led away. She didn't matter to anyone. Her parents never trusted her, never listened to her, and finally abandoned her after she asked them not to leave her. All she had left was Elsa, who also didn't trust her, or listen to her, and who had abandoned her years ago.

Anna's hysterics continued until she was exhausted. She slept like death. When she awoke, a heavy hand was on her heart. She felt muted and still. The unnatural calm was a relief after her emotional storm. She ate little, and said less.

When the powerful people finally agreed that the king and queen had died at sea, Anna didn't even cry. Her tears were done. She was agreeable to any suggestion anyone made for the funeral. The date was set. The dressmakers sewed her a black gown and cap.

Now she'll come out, Anna thought. But her intense need was gone. Whether or not Elsa came out did not have the power to hurt her anymore, or so she believed under that heavy hand.

The castle was draped in black. The monuments were carved. The year of mourning began. Elsa did not come out.

Surely she won't make me go alone to the funeral, Anna thought.

The immense stone monuments stood on the mountainside above the cemetery where the common people were buried. A crowd of townspeople accompanied the royal procession to the monuments, where Bishop Saholt conducted the service. Anna stood with bowed head, dressed in black, representing the royal family alone.

After the service, the entire Royal Council bowed to her, one by one, and spoke of King Agdar's wisdom and judgment, and Queen Idunn's beauty. They conveyed their deepest sympathies. They told her to be strong.

I don't want to be strong, I want to be loved, Anna thought. Strong people have to be alone, like Elsa.

Finally it was over. Anna wanted to remain at the monument with her emptiness. The burden of the lonely castle was more than she could bear. Almost, she asked them to leave her. It was the townspeople that decided her. She didn't want to talk to them. Most of them had never seen anyone from the royal family. She shrank away from their curiosity that would push and pull her into what they wanted from a princess, without ever knowing who she really was. She could be lonely on this crowded mountainside, or she could be lonely in the castle.

Anna walked down the mountain in her black gown and cap. The Royal Council let her take the lead, and slowed their steps to stay behind her as escort. She didn't have to talk to a single person on the way home. There was only one person she longed to talk to. Then her loneliness would be complete.

In the east corridor, Anna knocked lightly on Elsa's closed door. One corner of her mind knew she should be furious that Elsa let her go through all of that alone. But she didn't have the energy to be furious, or hopeful. She knew how this would end and she simply wanted to get to the end as quickly as possible.

"Elsa, please. We only have each other now. I'm not strong enough to do this alone. Elsa, please open the door."

There was no answer. She'd known that before she knocked. Anna put her back to Elsa's door and slid down to sit on the floor. Out of her sadness, she went back to the last question Elsa had ever answered. "Do you want to build a snowman?"

That heavy hand on her heart was her only answer.

* * *

Elsa heard Anna. She'd heard every word Anna ever said at the door over the years. She'd stopped answering because she could never say what Anna wanted to hear. Anna had always wanted more than Elsa could give.

Snowflakes hung suspended in the air in Elsa's room. Rays of frost bloomed out from where Elsa sat on the floor, back to back with Anna through the door, keeping her secret, still doing what her father wanted her to do because she didn't know how to do anything else.

* * *

_Author note:Thanks for the reviews, favorites and follows! The encouragement is nice. The next story in this series is Queen Elsa's Councilor: Councilor Bern was sworn in as Queen Elsa's councilor only a year before her coronation. The Royal Council was as stunned as the rest of Arendelle when Queen Elsa's ice froze the land. Shock struggles with loyalty in this story of the movie's events from the point of view of the Queen's newest councilor._


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